Self-worth refers to the value and worth that an individual places on themself. It is the belief and perception of one’s significance, abilities, and qualities. Self-worth is an internal feeling and can be influenced by many factors. When a person has a high level of self-worth, they generally have a positive self-image and confidence in their abilities. On the other hand, when a person has low self-worth, they may struggle with feelings of inadequacy and a lack of self-confidence.

Building and maintaining a healthy level of self-worth is essential for overall well-being and can impact various areas of a person’s life, including career, relationships, and personal growth. Humans are entitled to feelings of worth, yet not all get it. It is sad and miserable to suffer under the weight of inferiority and worthlessness. Everyone is eligible for inner boosts in value and self-worth.

Humans are entitled to feelings of worth, yet not all get it. It is sad and miserable to suffer under the weight of inferiority and worthlessness. Everyone is eligible for inner boosts in value and self-worth.

What influences one’s self-worth?

Self-worth is influenced by a variety of factors, including:

1. Early-life experiences: Childhood experiences, such as how parents and caregivers treat a person, can shape their beliefs about themselves and their self-worth. Children will likely become adults with healthy self-esteem if they grow up in positive, challenging environments. Are you a parent, minder or caregiver? Pay attention to the seeds you are sowing in those vulnerable hearts.

2. Self-talk: How people talk to themselves internally can build or diminish their sense of self-worth. Positive self-talk can help to build self-worth, while negative self-talk can erode it. Be careful about what conversations are going on in your head. Those “not good enough” chants and reminders of flaws and failures will not do you any good. Do not punish your future because of mistakes and errors made in the past. Learn from them and move on. Also, lop-sided comparisons with others can make you feel small; refrain from those.

3. Cultural and societal messages: Cultural beliefs and societal messages about value or worth can shape a person’s sense of self-worth. The predominant victims in this category, especially in Africa, are women. Most African cultures and traditions relegate women. Thus, some families will not invest in their girl-children; instead, they are nurtured to become reproductive and domestic support and nothing more. This continues upwards, so much so that in the workplace and politics, some groups will reject a qualified female because she is a woman.

4. Personal achievements: Personal achievements are accomplishments that a person has attained in life, whether significant or minor. These accomplishments can come in many forms, such as academic achievements, professional successes, personal growth, and even small daily achievements. When individuals achieve something they set out to do, whether a small task or an important goal, they feel a sense of satisfaction and pride. This can help boost their self-esteem, self-confidence, and overall well-being.

It is important to note that personal achievements do not have to be measured against anyone else’s standards or expectations. It is essential to set goals for yourself and work towards achieving them.

5. Social interactions: Social interactions refer to how people engage with each other. These interactions are fundamental to human life and significantly shape our behaviour, attitudes, and beliefs. Social interactions can take many forms, such as verbal communication, nonverbal communication, and social norms.

The way others treat a person can have a significant impact on their sense of self-worth. Positive feedback and support can build self-worth, while criticism and rejection undermine it. So, can you identify with any of these influencers on your self-worth?

Who determines self-worth?

The value of something is hinged on its importance or usefulness. Usually, it is in cognisance of its attributes, qualities or effectiveness that such value is ascribed. Only two individuals have a role in determining the value of a thing: the maker and the user. However, ultimately, the user has the final say.

God is our maker. He made us perfect. David realised this and proclaimed, “I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well” (Psalm 139:14). Again, in Ephesians 2:10 we are told, “For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them”.

To be wonderful is to be unique, delightful, glorious, gorgeous, grand, fantastic, fabulous, first-class, marvellous, magnificent and superb. That is how God made us. Every one of us is His workmanship, His creation and the display of His craftsmanship, skilfulness and expertise. More than that, as Manufacturer, He made us fit for purpose. So, we are exactly who we were meant to be in the scheme of things. And our worth ought to draw from the later than the superficial issues we attach to life and destiny.

Recall that I mention two individuals determining our self-worth; we have looked at the first One, God. The second is the user; you! I concluded that paragraph by saying that, however, ultimately, the user has the final say. No matter how well God made you, if you do not discover your purpose or choose to look down on or abuse yourself, you will not hold your self-worth. My husband says, “If you do not believe you can rise, even a crane cannot lift you!” Therefore, you must align yourself properly, noting that; a person’s worth is not solely based on external factors such as wealth, status, or appearance but rather on self-perception and character. The values they hold, the mindsets they develop, the respect they earn, and most importantly, their empathy towards others’ feelings, emotions, attitudes, and beliefs all contribute to their self-evaluation and wisdom.

In essence, one’s worth is determined by the depth and quality of their character. Consider a few ways we can improve our self-worth. Cultivating self-worth and value is an ongoing process that requires consistent effort and dedication. Here are some tips that can help:

1. Practice self-compassion: Treat yourself with kindness and understanding, just as you would a friend. Be patient with yourself when things don’t go as planned, and avoid self-criticism. 

2. Identify your strengths: Reflect on your positive qualities and what you excel at. Celebrate your achievements, no matter how small they may seem.

3. Set achievable goals: Set small, realistic goals and work your way up. This can help build confidence and give you a sense of accomplishment.

4. Surround yourself with positive people: Spend time with people who uplift and support you. Positive relationships can help you feel valued and appreciated.

5. Practice self-care: Take care of your physical, emotional, and mental health. This can include exercise, meditation, or time in nature.

6. Learn new skills: Expand your knowledge and expertise by learning new things. This can help you feel more competent and confident in yourself.

7. Challenge negative self-talk: Be aware of negative thoughts and replace them with positive affirmations. For example, instead of saying, “I’m not good enough,” try saying, “I’m doing the best I can.”

8. Deepen your relationship with God: Get into a more intimate relationship with God; through prayer and studying the word, we catch glimpses of our potential and begin to take the form God originally had for us from the beginning. 2 Corinthians 3:18 says, “But we all, with open face beholding as in a glass the glory of the Lord, are changed into the same image from glory to glory, even as by the Spirit of the Lord”.

Self-worth is not a static state and can evolve. It is crucial to acknowledge that building self-worth is a gradual process, and setbacks or mistakes can occur along the way. Through introspection, self-care, and personal development, individuals can take steps to enhance their self-worth. However, it is essential to remain committed to personal growth. Keep your focus on the progress towards developing a stronger sense of self-worth and see your value increase alongside!